\YES! I am PAINTING AGAIN!
"What do you mean again?"
"Let's just say it was a long winter. And the broken wrist and elbow didn't help. Yes, it was my left hand, but everything just took longer, and I got tired too easily, and..."
That's the voice inside my head, yelling at me to just get over it all and get back to the easel.
I did on Saturday. Four glorious hours parked at Chapoquoit Beach, painting out of the back of my car. Enjoy a summer day - an EXQUISITE summer day - with a full view - paintbrush in hand - asking myself WHY do I not do this more often?
So, do you wanna know the real answer? It's FEAR. Yes, I said FEAR.
Fear that when I show up at the easel, what I create might be, well, subpar. Not what I see in my mind's eye. What if I disappoint myself?
Which is ridiculous. Because as I would tell any one else who said the same thing to me, "it's just paint on canvas? How seriously wrong can you go?"
So, I recommit this summer. To MORE HOURS. That's all it takes. Like when I trained for my one and only marathon back in 2005 - just more footfalls on the pavement and you'll get there. So, with the painting, just more strokes of the brush and the pallette knife, and voila, more paintings! IF they turn out awful - well, scrape 'em, and start over. And IF they turn out - wonderful. Then simply shouts of JOY!!!!!
It's midnight. Time to turn in, so I can start again tomorrow. Stay tuned!
xoxoxo and blessings to every one of you.
ps - here's my favorite one from this past Saturday. Wander over to the 'fresh paint' page to see others. Nite nite.
Thoughts, dreams, questions.